One of the most captivating stories for me this year was saga of David Goldman. He’s the American father who tried for years to regain custody of his son, Sean, who had been kidnapped by Sean’s mother and brought to Brazil (her home country). The mother then promptly divorced Mr. Goldman, married a snarky Brazilian lawyer, and prohibited Mr. Goldman from seeing Sean. The mother died last year and the Brazilian courts awarded custody to said snarky lawyer step-father, who also prevented Mr. Goldman from seeing his son.
First of all, what’s up with Brazil? What’s up with a country that thinks a step-parent has more rights regarding a child than the biological father? What’s up with a country that denies a biological parent visitation rights? What’s up with a country that ignores a treaty it signed pertaining to international child abductions?
What’s up with a country that is the largest Catholic nation in the world, has the largest statue of Jesus (“Christ the Redeemer”—standing on a hill with outstretched arms overlooking Rio de Janeiro), and blatantly rejects the 8th Commandment: Thou Shalt Not Steal (as in another person’s child)?
The Onion’s “Atlas of the Planet Earth” called Our Dumb World says this about Brazil:
“People at their most beautiful; humanity at its ugliest.”
Well said.
Not well said: The belly-aching by the maternal grandmother of Sean, who called it a “heinous crime” to return Sean to his father on Christmas Eve. First of all, Crack-Pot Granny, you raised a woman who kidnapped her son and alienated him from the most important relationship in his childhood: a parent. You aided and abetted this despicable behavior. What does that say about your parental skills? It says you’re a pathetic human being and a lousy grandmother. Do you really think Sean would grow up and thank you for eliminating his father’s love, encouragement, guidance, support, advice, and nurturing during his formative years? Crack-Pot Granny, are you on crack?
Second of all, speaking of crimes, what kind of crime is it to deprive a father from his child for FIVE YEARS?! The kind that is called child abduction and anyone involved should be in prison. You and your disgusting son-in-law belong in prison. Maybe there’s room at Gitmo.
So listen up, Crack-Pot Granny, Snarky Lawyer Step-Idiot, and your ilk: stay out of America. Because if I see you over here slopping up the place with your presence, I’ll get after you with my handbag. And I carry a BIG ONE.
And lest people think that the Brazilian Supreme Court came to its senses and ruled in Mr. Goldman’s favor in the custody dispute when the lower courts had ruled against him, DON’T KID YOURSELF! This custody ruling had NOTHING to do with administering justice or what was legally or morally correct.
The ruling was all about money. The U.S. Senate halted a $2.75 billion trade deal that would have lifted tariffs on Brazilian exports. Money talks and Sean walks.
However it was accomplished, a father and son are finally and rightfully reunited. I applaud Mr. Goldman for his undying love and undying fight for his son. Sean needs to be raised by his only remaining parent. That is the natural order and right thing to do .
I hope the media lets the Goldmans be and Sean can assimilate back to his American life in peace. I read that they are headed to Disney World this week. Have fun. Have a Happy New Year. Have a great life.
P.S. How on earth did Brazil get awarded the hosting gig for the 2016 Olympics? Who did they bribe?
More from The Onion Atlas:
“Boasting some of the sexiest people ever to be stabbed repeatedly at night, Brazil is home to perhaps the most attractive victims of carjacking, robbery, and violent assault in the world.”
Don’t forget kidnapping! I think the U.S. Olympic Committee should issue warnings for Americans attending the Games: BEWARE: Brazilians steal American kids. DO NOT let your children out of your sight.
And I hope Sean watches the Games with his Dad from the comfort of his living room in New Jersey.
