The Constance McMillen story really gets to me. FYI: She’s the lesbian teenager from Mississippi who was not allowed to bring her girlfriend to her high school prom and a national brouhaha ensued. She was made to feel terrible by a mob of bigots simply because of her sexual orientation.
Since the teenage years are ruled by insecurity and immaturity, bad experiences in high school have a heightened painfulness about them. I suppose some can scar you for life.
Under “normal” circumstances, who comes out of adolescence unscathed? I hate that Constance was so shabbily slammed dunked in high school. It wasn’t just the date thing. The”fake prom” thing was especially horrendous—the parents of her school planned a decoy prom, which Candace attended, not knowing it wasn’t the real prom where the rest of the kids were. Despicable adult behavior.
Even though I considered myself “out there” in high school (and wanting badly to GET OUT OF THERE!), I was not an outsider or an outcast or out of the closet about anything. I think I had more parties at my house my senior year (no parental supervision) than anyone else, so I guess that means that my fellow classmates didn’t mind coming over and barfing on my living room carpet (Karen R., I’m talkin’ to you!)
Unlike Constance, there was only ONE girl (that I’m aware of!) that TRIED to hassle me. But I ignored her ‘being mean to me’ tactics. She went on to smoke cigarettes, avoid college, and process death certificates for a living. And I, of course, became a Fuchsia Woman! (Funny though, how you never forget the enemies, or in this case, a “frenemy. Or at least I don’t.)
Anyhoodles, it wasn’t even a small group of idiot students who did Constance wrong, but pretty much the entire idiot student body AND their idiot parents AND the idiot school administrators AND the idiot school district officials AND a wimpy judge. (See my blogs dated 3/31/10 and 4/17/10). As a result, Constance was forced to move from her hometown. That meant she had to attend a brand new school in the middle of her senior year. Really no fun. Or as we used to say in high school, “NON-STOP BUMMER!”
The ACLU represented Constance in a discrimination lawsuit against a State of Mississippi school district. The matter was settled this week. According to USA Today:
“The Itawamba County School District agreed to pay former student Constance $35,000 to end her lawsuit against the district, according to documents filed this week in U.S. District Court in Aberdeen. The school district also agreed to a non-discrimination policy that includes sexual orientation.”
But does winning this case restore her dignity that was trampled upon by the homophobic idiots in her hometown? I hope so. I hope she is laughing all the way to the bank…laughing all the way to college (with some financial help from by Ellen DeGeneres)…laughing all the way as the Marshall in the Gay Pride Parade in NY…laughing at the GLAAD Awards in L.A….laughing with her friends as she is having way more fun than any nest-of-party-poopers prom could provide…laughing because in years to come she can’t remember what all the fuss was about…
To Candace: For peace of mind, forgive and forget. Easier said than done. I SHOULD KNOW.
P.S. And look at the bright side: No High School Reunion invitations to worry about!
