Here’s another blog to file under: America, you can do better.
Last week a story about a high school senior caught my eye. (I remember high school really well—warts and all.) The student’s name is Ceara Sturgis and she lives in Jackson, Mississippi. What impressed me about Ceara (cool name!) was that she was a scholar (honor student), musician (trumpet player), and athlete (soccer goalie). How can you top that?
I think if all high schools were filled with students like Ceara, we would not see the despicable tragedy that happened in my neck of the woods in Richmond, CA—a brutal gang rape and beating of a 15 year-old-girl. Which is even more despicable as the sexual assault lasted over two hours and was witnessed by many observers who did nothing to help the girl. (I’ll be blogging about this later—if my stomach ever stops retching at the thought of this horrific incident).
Back to Ceara, an exemplary student with a simple request. She wants to be photographed for her senior picture (that is included in the yearbook) in a tuxedo instead of a drape. Why? Because she feels more comfortable in pants. Ceara’s Mom is quoted in an article as saying her daughter wears boys’ clothes and “the tux is who she is.”
So, what’s the big deal?
Plenty of women in America wear tuxedos—and consider them a snazzy fashion statement, as they are an elegant outfit. Nicole Kidman (no fashion slouch) wore one to a Hollywood function (around the time of the premiere of that dreary movie she made with Lauren Bacall called Birth).
I have a tuxedo—shock! It’s a man’s but fits me great. (Good deal on EBay.) It is a gray pinstripe fancy version with tails. I wore it to see Baz Lurhmann’s opera, La Boheme, in San Francisco. I got some interesting looks. I could tell some people liked it and some people didn’t. (Which was the same reaction of the audience for the opera.)
Ceara had a similar reaction as I did. In her case, one person in particular really didn’t like the idea of a tuxedo on a female high school student—the superintendent of the school district where Ceara attends.
Ceara’s mom received a letter from the school district stating, “only boys could wear tuxedos.” This letter was written despite the fact that the assistant superintendent said he didn’t know of any regulations in the student handbook regarding this issue.
Hmmm…what is going on here? Does the brouhaha over Ceara wearing a tux have anything to do with that fact that Ceara is gay? Is this a fashion problem or a homophobic problem? Is this about conformity or bigotry? Is this about upholding a tradition of what “girls are supposed to wear” or is this about discrimination against a decent girl?
Why can’t Ceara wear what she wants to wear? Why can’t Ceara be who she is?
I saw Ceara’s tux photo in Time Magazine. She looks adorable. If her high school does not publish her photo in the yearbook, it is their loss—losing a chance to honor an outstanding member of the graduating class, thus lessening the integrity of the yearbook for all the students. And that’s a shame.
Why can’t schools let terrific kids like Ceara be themselves?
What’s the big deal?
